Written in 2015, when Tinder’s popularity was on the rise, Love Me Now throwis a sharp light on casual relationships and today’s hook-up culture, Love Me Now is about the toxicity of casual dating and the grey area between love and sex, consent and compliance, yes and no. We spoke to writer, Michelle Barnette, to find out more.
Love Me Now is coming to Tristan Bates Theatre, what can you tell us about it?
I can tell you that it has one of the most amazing teams, that it’s very close to my heart, and that it’s not the play that you’re expecting it to be.
What inspired you to write it?
Love Me Now was written when I was very hurt, very angry, and very lonely. I had just gotten out of a really exhausting ‘relationship’ and I felt I had no right to complain because we had never technically been exclusive. Writing was a way to clear my head and make sense of my thoughts.
It was written in 2015, why did that seem like the right time to write it?
It felt very natural to write it in 2015 because that’s when I finally began seeking closure, but actually I was equally furious because the problems I was encountering were becoming more frequent. People read it and went, “it’s a captivating story but it’s not really relevant right now.” In hindsight, they were just missing the signals.
And do you think much has changed since it was written?
Frankly, I think it’s gotten worse. After I wrote Love Me Now it got hidden in a drawer for quite some time. When I pulled it back out the issue was everywhere. Somehow, breeding the hookup-no-strings culture facilitated a much more terrifying reality: most people were deeply unhappy with how they were being treated. I’m all for embracing sexuality and casual sex, if it works for you, great! But there’s a way to do that and still treat your partners with respect, which is the memo so many people seem to have missed.
What elements of Love Me Now do you think are most challenging for the cast?
The show is incredibly exposing, both emotionally and physically. There’s nowhere to hide. We felt it was of the utmost importance that our actors felt safe at all times so we brought in a wonderful fight and intimacy director, Enric Ortuno, who has spent a lot of time working with them. We’ve approached everything as a conversation: where do you feel comfortable being touched? Is this okay? What about this pressure? What’s our safe word in case something goes wrong? It’s our responsibility as theatre makers to look after our companies and it’s vital that as an industry we begin to seriously address safeguarding our actor’s wellbeing.
Do you think audiences will recognise elements of their own relationships in Love Me Now?
I think so. Even if you haven’t engaged with casual sex, everyone has engaged – in varying degrees – to power play and one-upmanship in relationships. We hear it all the time: let them stew, don’t reply right away, make them jealous, they have to miss you. Bad behaviors get encouraged slowly and subtly over time, they don’t magically appear overnight. The problem is that eventually these bad behaviors escalate, and what starts as a harmless way to “test the waters” actually leads to a much more dangerous problem: disconnection, disillusion, objectification. If we don’t allow ourselves to be honest with the people we’re meant to be the most vulnerable with, and if we aren’t being honest with ourselves, how do we expect to get anywhere at all?
Directed by Jamie Armitage, Love Me Now stars Alistair Toovey and Helena Wilson, and is at Tristan Bates Theatre 27th March – 14th April 2018.
