Review: Terrible Thames

On a cloudy and blustery Friday afternoon, I wrap up warm and head down to an unusual review request; a Horrible Histories boat and Terrible Thames! Eager to see what this experience would bring, I was not disappointed.

This is a 45-minute boat tour that sails from Tower Bridge Quay to Big Ben and back again. Heaped in with numerous tales, music, sound effects and riotously silly jokes! Brought to us by award-winning theatre producers the Birmingham Stage Company and Wood’s Silver Fleet. This entertainment is told through the lens of two actors who portray the characters of a student and teacher on a ‘I know more than you’ type competition throughout.

We are swept away by fun facts and gory tales; perfect for an exciting but also educational activity for children. We start at the tower of London and William the Conqueror, past HMS Belfast, under London Bridge and the spine-chilling tale of an Italian painter. Next was the Ministry of Defence and unknown stories about Henry VIII, past Big Ben, the London Eye and a boat crash on the Thames apparently? Information about the renowned Globe Theatre to some ghastly details about where people in London were executed. These were just some of the riveting facts upon board this ship.

The two actors energetically and adorably bounce two and fro facts and stories about London with lots of wide eyed and giggling children. A particularly amusing bit where they use sound effects and dramatically tell stories of World War I and the bombings. Also, when the flatulent humour comes up I see even many grown-ups roll their eyes and let out little gasps of laughs. A song about whaling gets us giddy in our seats and I can’t help but smile with joy at some children’s faces.

Although Terrible Thames is well executed, the information was very fast and seemed a bit rushed, this could have become a bit tiring as we almost didn’t have enough time to take it all in. Having said that – all in all, it was a cheerful, educational and happy go lucky way to spend an afternoon. I sat there with clouds and spits of rain and still had a big grin on my face. It was fabulously British and charming. A perfect outing for your little rascals!